oh gosh... just got off the phone with Kan not long ago... sighzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.. can't sleep ar straight away..... not going to sleep tonite.. i think i'm looking more n more like a panda now.. HAHA!!! i just found out.... no wait... actually i found out yrs ago that i'm not gd with words.. but never knew i was THAT terrible with words... as in whatever that comes outta my mouth is the harsher version of whatever i meant... helpppp =S=S=S.. how can ppl be so gd with words n be able to comfort others? i think i need to go attend those classes.. lolxxx..

i've just done some major thinking lately.. ppl from different countries r really different man.. even though we're of the same race.. obviously i'm a chinese from brunei n he's a chinese from hk.. lol.. like the reactions i get from my frens n him r so opposite.. i find brunei boys a little bit more gentleman.. as in they treat their gf better.. hehe.. i'm not complaining or anything.. just stating the difference.. for example.. my god.. that Jun Seng bought his gf a $600 phone!!! admire that too death la.. haha..

n like for instance i told Roland n Fei Hao that i'm starving to death at my guardian's.. they were like.. better go eat more la.. dun starve myself.. or at least let me see them eat.. making me drool.. at least they showed they care.. but u know what ken said? he said: "it's just...u don't want to go out jei.. u can always go to supermarket buy something else to eat.........." n added :"i think...u shouldn't expect...they cook for u 24 hours ma... u don't have to pay...... so..." wa.. u know how disappointed i was to hear that??? n Roland n Fei Hao even said:" i'm sure if Ken knew u were starving ar.. i'm sure he'd fly straight to u bringing food.. who would want their gf to suffer le??"

i just hope u'd be sweeter n softer ma... sighzzzzz... honestly.. u dunno how i wish i could stick around u the whole day.. i wished there was a type of glue that will stick us both together n never let u outta my sight.. but i'm really afraid u'd find me annoying alright? everything that i dun do is all coz i'm afraid.. my dream day would be just the 2 of us spending time together all day long.. from morning till nite.. doing things together.. like falling asleep while watching tv together.. lol.. or go out for a picnic.. i'd really love to cook a meal for the 2 of us.. eat together.. let u taste the dessert that i make n stuff.. dun u think i admire those couples that can do those stuff together?? but u hv to understand our condition.. how can we do those?? i've always wondered how u look like when u're sleeping.. or the way u brush ur teeth.. i'd just really like to see the way u live ur daily life.. there's a lot u dunno abt what i wish we could do.. n plus i was so hurt when i heard u say u're sure ur parents won't like a kinda girl like me........... =(=( n u even added that ur happiness in our relationship is equal to ur unhappiness... so a piece of advise... in the future.. better look for a gf that is from hk.. n if ur happiness in that relationship is still equal to ur unhappiness.. better dump her n look for a girl that'll make u happy more than being unhappy.. but now u're stuck with me!!!! =P=P